WHEN BLACK FRIDAY COMES

This is why sane people (primarily men) stay home the day after Thanksgiving:

A Wal-Mart worker died after being trampled when hundreds of shoppers smashed through the doors of a Long Island store Friday morning, police and witnesses said.

The 34-year-old worker, employed as an overnight stock clerk, tried to hold back the unruly crowds just after the Valley Stream store opened at 5 a.m.

Witnesses said the surging throngs of shoppers knocked the man down. He fell and was stepped on. As he gasped for air, shoppers ran over and around him.

Well, that and the fact that we're overstuffed and drowsy still.

And no, no obligatory "where's my recession dude?" quote; most people already know the economy isn't as tough as they're being told, yet at least.